So you made it through the difficulty of a sudden loss, or diagnosis, illness, and death, and the memorial celebration is now behind you. If your loved one was cremated, perhaps they left specific directions on what to do with their remains. But if not, now you are faced with another difficult decision: what do I do with the ashes of my loved one?
Deciding what to do with the cremated remains, or ashes, of our loved ones can be a deeply personal and emotional choice. While more traditional options like scattering ashes in a special place or keeping them in an urn are still common, there are increasingly creative and unique ways to memorialize your loved ones. In this post, we’ll explore some unconventional yet touching options that cater to various preferences and budgets, ensuring that everyone can find a meaningful way to remember their loved ones.
1. Planting a Memorial Tree: Life from Ashes
For those who want to celebrate life in the face of loss, planting a memorial tree can be a beautiful and environmentally friendly choice. Many organizations and nurseries offer memorial tree planting services, allowing you to choose a tree that holds special significance. The ashes can be mixed with other nutrients (the pH of ashes alone is generally not good for plant growth) and then mixed in with soil, providing nourishment for the tree as it grows. This option not only contributes to the environment but also creates a living tribute that can be visited and cherished for years to come.
2. Create Memorial Jewelry: Keep Them Close to Your Heart
Another intimate way to honor a loved one is by turning their ashes into memorial jewelry. Various artisans and jewelry designers offer customizable pieces, such as pendants, rings, or bracelets, incorporating a small amount of ashes into the design. This option allows you to keep a physical connection with your loved one, and prices can range from affordable to more intricate, depending on your preferences and budget.
3. Tattoo Memorialization: Wear Their Memory on Your Skin
One increasingly popular and deeply personal way to memorialize a loved one is through ash-infused tattoos. Many tattoo artists now offer the option to mix a small amount of cremated ashes with tattoo ink, creating a lasting tribute that is both unique and intimate. The ashes are sterilized and carefully mixed with the ink, allowing you to carry a part of your loved one with you wherever you go. This option is not only meaningful but also accessible, with prices varying depending on the size and complexity of the tattoo.
4. Incorporate Ashes into Art: Transforming Loss into Beauty
Similar to tattoos, many other artists specialize in creating unique pieces of art using cremation ashes. Whether it’s a painting, sculpture, or glasswork, these artists can incorporate the ashes into the materials, creating a one-of-a-kind masterpiece that captures the essence of your loved one. Prices for commissioned art pieces vary, making this option accessible for different budgets.
Choosing what to do with a loved one’s ashes is a deeply personal decision. Whether you opt for a tattoo, a memorial tree, jewelry, or a unique piece of art, the key is to find a tribute that resonates with you and reflects the essence of the person you’ve lost. These options, as well as scattering in special places or keeping them in a box or urn, cater to different preferences and financial situations, ensuring that everyone can find a meaningful way to keep the memory of their loved ones alive. As a bereavement counselor in Seattle and grief counselor and Buddhist chaplain for people across North America, I do want to remind you, there’s no right or wrong way to memorialize; it’s about finding what feels right for you.
~ Rev. Jessica McKimmie
