Grief finds you Just when you think you’re free when you think you’ve buried it completely or washed it away or cursed it off or sang through it in joyous revelation. Grief finds you when you think it’s been too long it’s gone for good when you think you’ve adjusted to the hand you’ve been dealt. Grief […]
Self-Judgement on the Path
Entering a new environment of any kind can bring up wonder, curiosity, fear, anxiety, joy. The experience was no different as I entered the zendo (Buddhist temple) at Upaya Zen Center for the first time. Although I had been studying Buddhism and practicing meditation for several years, each temple has its own chants, forms, and […]
To Hold Death in One’s Hand
Today, I found a bird on my porch. It must have flown into the window and suffered enough damage to not wake up again. A fitting day with death, I thought, just days before I depart on my journey toward chaplaincy. I am going to spend the next several years becoming more and more comfortable with […]
My Path to Chaplaincy
All moments in our lives lead us to the present moment. With the support of family, friends, and mindfulness community (sangha), the cumulation of many moments has led me to the path of Chaplaincy. In March I began studying under Joan Halifax and other wonderful teachers at Upaya Zen Center in Santa Fe, New Mexico. Upaya’s […]
Love Wins.
I just spent a beautiful weekend in San Diego where I had the opportunity to officiate the wedding of my dear friends – who happen to be a same-sex couple. Their ceremony told a story of their foundation of friendship, their vows were incredibly raw with emotion, and their wedding rings were passed through each guest’s […]
Why Black Lives Matter
The next time someone says ‘all lives matter,’ show them these 5 paragraphs — By Kevin Roose from http://fusion.net/story/170591/the-next-time-someone-says-all-lives-matter-show-them-these-5-paragraphs/ This week, high-profile police killings of two black men—Alton Sterling of Baton Rouge, Louisiana, and Philando Castile, who was killed in Falcon Heights, Minnesota—have renewed heated debates about police violence, and brought the Black Lives Matter […]
So You Survived the Holidays
There is something about the holidays that tends to resurface grief in a uniquely intense way. The cooling of nature, the shortened hours of daylight, life all around us slowing down to a halt…countered by shopping fanaticism, coordination with (perhaps undesirable) family members, traffic and airport lines. The constant observation of families together can send a […]
A Wave of Grief
It’s been two and a half years since my mom passed — and approaching the 12-year anniversary of my dad passing. I’ve committed myself to the grief process and healing process, and this blog is a part of that commitment. It’s a lot of work. And I have enjoyed moments, days, and even months of extreme peace because of the […]
Spreading Ashes: A Poem
As we delve into a series on the world of grief rituals, I wanted to begin by offering this poem that was written by a dear friend, Lauri Stock, after a weekend spent spreading her mother’s ashes with her family and mother’s friends. I asked if she would write about her experience to share with the Peace […]
From Peace to Panic
Waking up before 5am is usually a sign for me to roll over and go back to sleep. But this time I was wide awake. So I rolled out of bed and shuffled toward the porch to see what colors had taken the sky. The sun was beginning its daily routine of emergence and reflection onto the Puget Sound. Each morning […]